How to Miserably Fail at Keeping a Diet
I did it! I took the decision!
I found the perfect pair of jeans. I’ve ravaged 3 shopping centers and I found them! Ironically, my triumph is not complete! Of course they don’t have my size… What to do? Should I go for the smaller size or the larger one? What the heck! I’ll get the smaller pair! And congratulations to me! I bought a pair of jeans and a diet. But am I as committed to wearing those pants as I was to finding them?
One dress size, a few pounds… What’s that? I should be able to wear them in a week! Start tonight, skip dinner, jog in the mornings, diet the rest of the week. No biggy!
Good plan so far! But what actually happened?
I got home. Obviously, I was hungry. Don’t judge! Shopping is so exhausted. And I need to celebrate those new jeans and my new goal weight with a nice dinner (Excuses, excuse). Maybe a piece of that chocolate cake I bought before leaving the mall (Ops…That wasn’t a smart move…)
Next morning? Way too early to go jogging! And too cold to get out of bed for that matter! I glance over to the pants that are giving me a tantalizing glare. I get out of bed somewhat motivated, but not enough for jogging. Now it’s time for breakfast! Just when I’m doing the washing up I remember! Diet! Crap! Oh well… I’ll stay on track from now on!
Guess what… Lunch time!!! Let’s see what diet food I can find! I take a look in the fridge… Huston, we have a problem! What am I going to do with all this food? I can’t let it go to waste! And I can’t just throw it away either. I guess I’ll have to eat. And I’ll start the diet when I empty up the fridge?!?
3 days later…
I’m almost done emptying the fridge! Soon I can go shopping for my diet food of choice! But today, remember to get some bacon! I can’t finish off the eggs without bacon. And what should I do with all this cheese? I know! Make a cheese sauce and buy some pasta for it!
Another 3 days passed.
Holly crap! I’m right back where I started! My fridge is stuffed and I haven’t lost an ounce. If anything, “being on a diet” gives me the sense of relief that I’m moving in the right direction weight wise. So I don’t even bother to control what I’m eating.
So where am I now?
In a state of deep regret! I regret not committing to my decision. My perfect jeans look quite upset. I promised I’d take them out this weekend, but I just ended up disappointing them. They’ll forgive me eventually! But the scale won’t… It won’t talk to me… Now I really have to make amends!
It’s time to really get to work! I’m more motivated than ever! Care to find out how I do it?